T is for TPR

 TPR or termination of parental rights is the death sentence of children's court. Basically the judge rules that one or both of the parents are not safe/capable of raising the child and the rights are forcibly terminated. This is worse than a voluntary termination because it is proof further down the line that you were considered an unfit parent and it makes you more likely to lose any future children. I have heard some cases where they didn't remove future children at birth but I have heard of cases where they did, I think it really has to do with your state and reason for TPR.

 We have only had to watch the TPR process happen once. That was with Angel. Her case was drawn out and somewhat scary because we knew how much was at stake. First there was the criminal trial and we had to help Angel prepare to testify. Since we're in a small town we don't have the equipment for her testimony to be video taped and shown in court she was going to have to testify in front of her father. The father who abused her sexually, physically and emotionally. She asked my husband if he could go up with her and we got permission, the therapist suggested my husband use his body to block her view of her father so he would be unable to intimidate her. Luckily her dad took a plea bargain and plead down from abuse to neglect. Not as much jail time (was supposed to be a year and he was only in 3 weeks) but she didn't have to testify. Then he decided to fight for her and get her back. We were so nervous because according to his criminal case it showed he was 'only' neglectful. Happily he didn't show and the judge said 'well apparently this isn't important to him' but went through the whole trial process and ruled termination. It was such a relief to be there with Miss L who was desperate to adopt Angel. I'm happy to report that Angel is doing AMAZING, no more accidents, flinching from men, or dissociation type of episodes oh and I swear she's grown a couple of feet.

 I'm glad they didn't have to TPR on Princess' mom. She did it voluntarily which means down the road if she gets her life together she'll get another chance to parent. Plus it keeps it more pleasant for trying to set up visits with us down the road because it doesn't feel like we stole her daughter.